Stupid Things My Brother Told Me...

I got to thinking the other day, about how my older brother told me the dumbest things when I was younger. To this day, when I bring these things up he completely denies (or can't remember) telling me such strange things.
I don't know why older brothers always have to annoy their younger siblings by telling them off the wall things, or doing things just to annoy or spite them.
However, I do recall him telling me once that if you have to poop really bad and sit down too hard the poop will come out of your mouth. Another one of his tales involved us watching a show about the effects of an atom bomb. There were shadows of the people on a wall, and the wall was bleached around the shadows from the atomic blast. He told me that the people evaporated so fast from the blast it left their shadows behind.
Yet another time he told me the reason why we have to wash our hands before we eat is because the dirt rolls out from underneath our finger nails and down into the food at the other end of the spoon or fork and we eat the food, dirt and all.

Today my brother is married, has a daughter, and works as some kind of supervisor at a telecommunications company, and he's still kind of a dork.
(Love ya big bro) :)